Halloween is a nightmare for overweight people who are addicted to sugar. There's candy everywhere. This year, I have no one to blame but myself because I bought the bad foods. And, for me, it's not just sugar. It's all junk food that causes a problem.
After a great week last week, I fell completely off the wagon this week. And it's really going to show on the scale come Friday morning. It started with a slight splurge Friday night and then there was the Halloween party on Saturday.
I could have recovered from both.
Instead, I ate nearly a whole bag of potato chips on Monday and then I made the mistake of buying a bag of snack-sized candy bars on Tuesday. I don't know how many Kit-Kats, Reese's peanut butter cups, Almond Joys and Hershey's chocolate bars I ate, but it was a lot.
Of course, I also ate two chocolate chip cookies today. When I stopped at the grocery store on the way home from work tonight, I had a feeling it wouldn't go well. I had just told myself that I might as well eat whatever I wanted because I'd already blown it this week.
I know that's not the right attitude. I made three laps around Harris Teeter. I looked at the prepackaged mac and cheese and the frozen pizza (twice). I considered a steak or sushi or a pre-made wrap. I even glanced at the carrot cake. At one point, I ended up on the chip aisle. Luckily, I didn't stay there long.
I came close to leaving without buying anything. But then I still wouldn't have anything to eat for dinner. I opted for Weight Watchers frozen spaghetti with meat sauce. (BTW, the WW dinners are buy one, get one free this week so I also bought the thai-style chicken and noodles.)
Even after I paid and was walking to my car, I wasn't sure I'd made the right decision. Driving away, I thought about swinging through the McDonald's drive-thru. But I didn't. I came home and ate my spaghetti.
I keep telling myself that I might have made bad decisions this week, but it's never too late to start over. I ate a lot of stuff I wish I hadn't but I can't change that now. All I can do is try not to make the same mistakes. It sure would be a lot easier if I wasn't addicted to junk food. I can never eat just one chip or one piece of candy. It's always the whole bag (well, almost the whole bag).
And to top it off, I'm feeling completely self-conscious this week. My self-esteem is pretty low and that just makes me want to eat more junk food. It's a vicious cycle.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Weekly weigh-in: Keys to success
Last week's weight: 175.6
This week's weight: 173
Difference: -2.6
Total weight lost since January 2010: 98.8
I've been lamenting a lot lately about gaining a few pounds over the past few months. I'm pretty frustrated that since April, I've basically maintained my weight. But then I started thinking about what I did to be successful in the past. This is by no means an exhaustive list and what works for me might not work for others, but here are the steps that seem to have helped me the most since I first started losing weight in January 2010.
1. Keep track. I've used the Weight Watchers online tracking system from the beginning. Time and again, I've learned that when I log everything I eat and drink, I lose weight. This is true even when I indulge because I tend to make up for overdoing it one day by being very strict the next day. For those who don't know, Weight Watchers assigns a points value everything and you get a certain number of points each day based on your current weight, height and typical level of physical activity. You also earn extra points for exercising and you get 49 weekly points to use however you want. Some people find it difficult to keep track of points, but it's easy for me and I can do it through an app on my phone.
2. Plan ahead. One reason I lost weight this week is because I planned everything I ate in advance. That takes a lot of effort, but losing weight is never easy. I even planned my splurges this week. It also helps when I decide what I'm going to order before going out to a restaurant. If I can stick with the plan, I lose weight.
3. Exercise. I don't do enough, but walking a few miles at least 3 to 4 times a week (or riding my exercise bike) simply makes me feel better. I do earn a few extra points from it, but mostly it just makes me feel good about myself.
4. Don't deprive myself. The times when I've been the least successful and I tend to binge eat seem to revolve around me trying to be too restrictive. (For the record, my binge eating also coincides with particularly stressful situations.) For example, we had a bake sale at work this week. I was tempted to try to avoid it. I might have been able to do it, but then I probably would have gorged on something awful later that day because I wouldn't have been able to stop thinking about the bad foods. Instead, I limited what I ate. And it was a little more than I should have eaten, but I didn't go overboard. I also do better when I build snacks such as popcorn, lowfat ice cream and cheese into my daily plan. I also can't eliminate pasta and potatoes. I just have to limit how much I eat of those things.
5. Be realistic. This is probably the biggest mental hurdle. My whole life I've been the kind of person who can do whatever I want as long as I set my mind to it. I don't usually shy away from a challenge and I don't usually fail when I take something on. So when the number on the scale doesn't change like I want it to and I start to think I'll never lose the last 20 poounds, I get frustrated and I feel defeated. That's probably never going to change. But I have gotten better about cutting myself some slack. I work really hard at seeing the big picture -- I've lost almost 100 pounds. I used to be a size 22/24 and now I'm comfortably a size 12. I used to be unable to walk a block, but now I can walk miles and miles. I used to sit at home and eat all the time. Now I go out and enjoy my life. If I never lose another pound, I have been successful.
This week's weight: 173
Difference: -2.6
Total weight lost since January 2010: 98.8
I've been lamenting a lot lately about gaining a few pounds over the past few months. I'm pretty frustrated that since April, I've basically maintained my weight. But then I started thinking about what I did to be successful in the past. This is by no means an exhaustive list and what works for me might not work for others, but here are the steps that seem to have helped me the most since I first started losing weight in January 2010.
1. Keep track. I've used the Weight Watchers online tracking system from the beginning. Time and again, I've learned that when I log everything I eat and drink, I lose weight. This is true even when I indulge because I tend to make up for overdoing it one day by being very strict the next day. For those who don't know, Weight Watchers assigns a points value everything and you get a certain number of points each day based on your current weight, height and typical level of physical activity. You also earn extra points for exercising and you get 49 weekly points to use however you want. Some people find it difficult to keep track of points, but it's easy for me and I can do it through an app on my phone.
2. Plan ahead. One reason I lost weight this week is because I planned everything I ate in advance. That takes a lot of effort, but losing weight is never easy. I even planned my splurges this week. It also helps when I decide what I'm going to order before going out to a restaurant. If I can stick with the plan, I lose weight.
3. Exercise. I don't do enough, but walking a few miles at least 3 to 4 times a week (or riding my exercise bike) simply makes me feel better. I do earn a few extra points from it, but mostly it just makes me feel good about myself.
4. Don't deprive myself. The times when I've been the least successful and I tend to binge eat seem to revolve around me trying to be too restrictive. (For the record, my binge eating also coincides with particularly stressful situations.) For example, we had a bake sale at work this week. I was tempted to try to avoid it. I might have been able to do it, but then I probably would have gorged on something awful later that day because I wouldn't have been able to stop thinking about the bad foods. Instead, I limited what I ate. And it was a little more than I should have eaten, but I didn't go overboard. I also do better when I build snacks such as popcorn, lowfat ice cream and cheese into my daily plan. I also can't eliminate pasta and potatoes. I just have to limit how much I eat of those things.
5. Be realistic. This is probably the biggest mental hurdle. My whole life I've been the kind of person who can do whatever I want as long as I set my mind to it. I don't usually shy away from a challenge and I don't usually fail when I take something on. So when the number on the scale doesn't change like I want it to and I start to think I'll never lose the last 20 poounds, I get frustrated and I feel defeated. That's probably never going to change. But I have gotten better about cutting myself some slack. I work really hard at seeing the big picture -- I've lost almost 100 pounds. I used to be a size 22/24 and now I'm comfortably a size 12. I used to be unable to walk a block, but now I can walk miles and miles. I used to sit at home and eat all the time. Now I go out and enjoy my life. If I never lose another pound, I have been successful.
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Recipe: Chicken and quinoa
Ingredients
4 (4 oz. each) chicken breasts
4 tsp. hoisin sauce
1/2 cup quinoa (dry)
1 jalapeno pepper, diced
1 shallot, diced
1/4 cup diced red, yellow or green peppers (I used frozen, which comes with all three.)
4 plums, diced
1/4 cup reduced-fat feta cheese
Salt and pepper to taste
Cooking spray
Coat a baking sheet with cooking spray. Place chicken breasts on pan and spread 1/2 teaspoon of hoisin sauce on each piece. Bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes. Turn chicken breasts and coat with 1/2 teaspoon of hoisin sauce. Bake for 15 more minutes. Turn chicken breasts again and bake until done (about 15 minutes, but it depends on how thick they are).
Meanwhile, prepare quinoa in a sauce pan according to the directions on the package. While the quinoa is simmering, add in diced jalapeno pepper, shallot and other peppers. Once the water has been absorbed, stir in the diced plums. After the mixture is slightly cool, stir in the feta cheese.
Makes 4 servings.
Weekly weigh-in: Avoidance isn't the answer
Last week's weight: 172.8
This week's weight: 175.6
Difference: +2.8
Total weight lost since January 2010: 96.2
I've spent the past two days trying to come to terms with my recent weight gain. I knew I'd gained before I ever stepped on the scale Friday morning. And a one-week gain isn't anything to be too concerned about. The problem is that I've actually gained about six pounds in the past couple of months. That scares me.
I know I haven't made the best food choices lately and I feel like I've been avoiding the problem. What worries me most is that the binge-eating attacks seem to be happening more frequently. Of course, there are personal and professional reasons for why I might be struggling with weight loss right now. But I know long-term success requires me to learn to handle those situations without turning to food.
Maybe I'm not quite there mentally. But I am encouraged that I recognize my pitfalls and I finally feel like I'm trying to accept the mistakes I've made when it comes to using food to make me feel better.
These past two days have been extremely difficult. I feel like I've been in withdrawal. But I've managed to track everything I've eaten and drank in those two days and I've stayed within my Weight Watchers points allotment. The hardest moment came at dinner out with friends, when I really wanted to order a cheeseburger and dark specialty beer. I forced myself to get a salad, which turned out to be delicious, and a light beer. Then I reminded myself that not every dinner out is a reason to splurge. At the movies after dinner, I bought nothing because I wasn't hungry. Realizing that is how I was so successful in the beginning of my weight loss journey. That was a huge mental win.
I don't know if I can maintain this pace, but I bought nothing but healthy foods at the grocery store today. That should help me stay on track this week. And now on day three, I'm starting to feel the sugar cravings lessen a bit. Physically and mentally, I feel better and prepared to make the right choices this week.
This week's weight: 175.6
Difference: +2.8
Total weight lost since January 2010: 96.2
I've spent the past two days trying to come to terms with my recent weight gain. I knew I'd gained before I ever stepped on the scale Friday morning. And a one-week gain isn't anything to be too concerned about. The problem is that I've actually gained about six pounds in the past couple of months. That scares me.
I know I haven't made the best food choices lately and I feel like I've been avoiding the problem. What worries me most is that the binge-eating attacks seem to be happening more frequently. Of course, there are personal and professional reasons for why I might be struggling with weight loss right now. But I know long-term success requires me to learn to handle those situations without turning to food.
Maybe I'm not quite there mentally. But I am encouraged that I recognize my pitfalls and I finally feel like I'm trying to accept the mistakes I've made when it comes to using food to make me feel better.
These past two days have been extremely difficult. I feel like I've been in withdrawal. But I've managed to track everything I've eaten and drank in those two days and I've stayed within my Weight Watchers points allotment. The hardest moment came at dinner out with friends, when I really wanted to order a cheeseburger and dark specialty beer. I forced myself to get a salad, which turned out to be delicious, and a light beer. Then I reminded myself that not every dinner out is a reason to splurge. At the movies after dinner, I bought nothing because I wasn't hungry. Realizing that is how I was so successful in the beginning of my weight loss journey. That was a huge mental win.
I don't know if I can maintain this pace, but I bought nothing but healthy foods at the grocery store today. That should help me stay on track this week. And now on day three, I'm starting to feel the sugar cravings lessen a bit. Physically and mentally, I feel better and prepared to make the right choices this week.
Friday, October 12, 2012
Weekly weigh-in: Frustrated, but thankful
Last week's weight: 172.6
This week's weight: 172.8
Difference: +0.2
Total weight lost since January 2010: 99
I've been very frustrated with my lack of progress lately. In fact, this whole year so far hasn't produced the results I'd hoped for. I've lost less than 10 pounds since Jan. 1 when I'd hoped to lose about 30 pounds this year and reach my goal of 150 pounds. There's no chance of that happening at this point. (BTW, I'm sorry I didn't blog last week. I was out of town. But I did weigh-in, so that's the number I used.)
Despite feeling like I've been stuck in the same place all year, I keep reminding myself to look at the big picture. While I feel bad about hovering around the 100-pounds-lost mark, I'm thankful that I'm able to maintain my weight loss.
One of my biggest fears since I started this journey has been that I'd gain it all back. It happens to a lot of people. I truly believe, however, that I could maintain my current weight for the rest of my life. It wouldn't be easy because I already struggle every day with making the right food choices. But I see that eating healthy is a habit for me now. Eating bad foods is not the norm. Sure, I still indulge from time to time. But it is a splurge and my mind sees it that way. I'm very happy that I haven't had any binge-eating moments in about two weeks because that tells me I'm not using food as a coping mechanism.
My hope is that by having these long stretches where I don't lose weight, my body is adjusting to the new way of eating and it's giving me a greater chance at long-term success. There really is nothing wrong with maintaining my current weight.
This week's weight: 172.8
Difference: +0.2
Total weight lost since January 2010: 99
I've been very frustrated with my lack of progress lately. In fact, this whole year so far hasn't produced the results I'd hoped for. I've lost less than 10 pounds since Jan. 1 when I'd hoped to lose about 30 pounds this year and reach my goal of 150 pounds. There's no chance of that happening at this point. (BTW, I'm sorry I didn't blog last week. I was out of town. But I did weigh-in, so that's the number I used.)
Despite feeling like I've been stuck in the same place all year, I keep reminding myself to look at the big picture. While I feel bad about hovering around the 100-pounds-lost mark, I'm thankful that I'm able to maintain my weight loss.
One of my biggest fears since I started this journey has been that I'd gain it all back. It happens to a lot of people. I truly believe, however, that I could maintain my current weight for the rest of my life. It wouldn't be easy because I already struggle every day with making the right food choices. But I see that eating healthy is a habit for me now. Eating bad foods is not the norm. Sure, I still indulge from time to time. But it is a splurge and my mind sees it that way. I'm very happy that I haven't had any binge-eating moments in about two weeks because that tells me I'm not using food as a coping mechanism.
My hope is that by having these long stretches where I don't lose weight, my body is adjusting to the new way of eating and it's giving me a greater chance at long-term success. There really is nothing wrong with maintaining my current weight.
Saturday, September 29, 2012
Weekly weigh-in: A little better
Last week's weight: 173.6
This week's weight: 173.2
Difference: -0.4
Total weight lost since January 2010: 98.6
I'm glad I lost a little bit of the weight I gained last week, but I'm still frustrated and disappointed with my eating this past week. For two straight weeks, I haven't kept track of my food and the scale shows it. I did better this week because I didn't binge eat or go overboard. I did, however, eat too much junk food, including lots of mini candy bars at work. I also exercised almost every day this week, so that helped.
I really feel like I've been heading in the wrong direction. I've said it before, but maintaining my weight lost (and losing 20 more pounds) requires constant attention. I have to plan everything I eat and drink. Otherwise, I consume too much or the wrong foods.
I'm trying not to let it stress me out, but I'll be in DC next weekend and I have family visiting me the weekend after that, which means I'll likely be eating and drinking more than normal. The thought of gaining more than I already have in the past couple of weeks scares me. I looked back this morning at my weight tracker for the past year. I've lost only 15 pounds total. That's pretty frustrating since I lost only 20 pounds in the year before that. Realizing how slow my progress has been is disappointing, especially when I lost 50 pounds in the first six months of my journey.
The only time I lose now is when I'm very strict about what I eat, when I eat and how much I eat. And I spend most of those weeks feeling like I'm starving. I start to wonder if it's worth it. But then I try on clothes and realize how close I am to being a size 10. Just a few pounds (OK, maybe 10) and I'll be there. I want to get there. So I keep trying.
That brings me to the start of a new week (remember, my weight loss week starts on Friday). I tracked everything I ate and drank yesterday and I went over by just one Weight Watchers point. That's a good day. And I've started today right. I guess that's all I can do at this point.
This week's weight: 173.2
Difference: -0.4
Total weight lost since January 2010: 98.6
I'm glad I lost a little bit of the weight I gained last week, but I'm still frustrated and disappointed with my eating this past week. For two straight weeks, I haven't kept track of my food and the scale shows it. I did better this week because I didn't binge eat or go overboard. I did, however, eat too much junk food, including lots of mini candy bars at work. I also exercised almost every day this week, so that helped.
I really feel like I've been heading in the wrong direction. I've said it before, but maintaining my weight lost (and losing 20 more pounds) requires constant attention. I have to plan everything I eat and drink. Otherwise, I consume too much or the wrong foods.
I'm trying not to let it stress me out, but I'll be in DC next weekend and I have family visiting me the weekend after that, which means I'll likely be eating and drinking more than normal. The thought of gaining more than I already have in the past couple of weeks scares me. I looked back this morning at my weight tracker for the past year. I've lost only 15 pounds total. That's pretty frustrating since I lost only 20 pounds in the year before that. Realizing how slow my progress has been is disappointing, especially when I lost 50 pounds in the first six months of my journey.
The only time I lose now is when I'm very strict about what I eat, when I eat and how much I eat. And I spend most of those weeks feeling like I'm starving. I start to wonder if it's worth it. But then I try on clothes and realize how close I am to being a size 10. Just a few pounds (OK, maybe 10) and I'll be there. I want to get there. So I keep trying.
That brings me to the start of a new week (remember, my weight loss week starts on Friday). I tracked everything I ate and drank yesterday and I went over by just one Weight Watchers point. That's a good day. And I've started today right. I guess that's all I can do at this point.
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Weekly weigh-in: Downward spiral
Last week's weight: 170.8
This week's weight: 173.6
Difference: +2.8
Total weight lost since January 2010: 98.2
Saying I had a bad week is an understatement. There wasn't a single day where I didn't make a bad food choice. And my decisions got worse as the week progressed. Even after weighing in yesterday morning, I proceeded to indulge. Just yesterday I ate a cheeseburger, a hot dog, two cookies, chips, pizza and cake. Naturally, the number on the scale this morning was even worse than when I officially weighed in yesterday.
In hindsight, this week's complete disaster has been coming for a few weeks. I can see that now. What really cemented it was an emotional trigger on Tuesday -- I officially signed the paperwork to sell my dad's house. As many of you know, he passed away in May 2011. Dealing with his estate has been an emotional roller coaster ever since.
Once I got headed down the wrong path Tuesday, I decided to simply give in. Fighting my urge to eat everything in sight was just too much. I didn't have it in me. So I told myself I had until the end of the day Friday to eat whatever I wanted and worry about the consequences later. I ate and ate and ate. The overeating not only made me feel guilty but also made me feel bad physically.
I woke up this morning and I knew what I had to do. I walked for an hour on the beach and now I've got a healthy breakfast under way. In addition to the pizza and cake I bought at the grocery store last night, I bought tons of fruits, veggies and whole grains so I'd be prepared for today. I've got a very strict diet planned for the next two days because I know I need to rid my body of all the bad stuff, especially sugar. Following it might be painful at first, but I think I'll be feeling so much better by Monday because of it.
I admit that I went a little nuts this past week. It happens. I'm not going to beat myself up. But I refuse to let that behavior continue. I've worked far too hard to change my habits to give up now.
This week's weight: 173.6
Difference: +2.8
Total weight lost since January 2010: 98.2
Saying I had a bad week is an understatement. There wasn't a single day where I didn't make a bad food choice. And my decisions got worse as the week progressed. Even after weighing in yesterday morning, I proceeded to indulge. Just yesterday I ate a cheeseburger, a hot dog, two cookies, chips, pizza and cake. Naturally, the number on the scale this morning was even worse than when I officially weighed in yesterday.
In hindsight, this week's complete disaster has been coming for a few weeks. I can see that now. What really cemented it was an emotional trigger on Tuesday -- I officially signed the paperwork to sell my dad's house. As many of you know, he passed away in May 2011. Dealing with his estate has been an emotional roller coaster ever since.
Once I got headed down the wrong path Tuesday, I decided to simply give in. Fighting my urge to eat everything in sight was just too much. I didn't have it in me. So I told myself I had until the end of the day Friday to eat whatever I wanted and worry about the consequences later. I ate and ate and ate. The overeating not only made me feel guilty but also made me feel bad physically.
I woke up this morning and I knew what I had to do. I walked for an hour on the beach and now I've got a healthy breakfast under way. In addition to the pizza and cake I bought at the grocery store last night, I bought tons of fruits, veggies and whole grains so I'd be prepared for today. I've got a very strict diet planned for the next two days because I know I need to rid my body of all the bad stuff, especially sugar. Following it might be painful at first, but I think I'll be feeling so much better by Monday because of it.
I admit that I went a little nuts this past week. It happens. I'm not going to beat myself up. But I refuse to let that behavior continue. I've worked far too hard to change my habits to give up now.
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