Weekly weigh-in: The struggle within

Last week's weight: 181.6
This week's weight: 179.8
Difference: -1.8
Total weight lost since Jan. 1, 2013: 1.6 pounds

I feel like I've been writing the same posts for a year now. I have a good week, then a bad week, then a good week. And, unfortunately, I've gained 10 pounds in the past few months. While the weight gain has been depressing and disappointing, there's good news. I still know what I need to do to be successful again. The hard part is doing it.

Every time I'm around food lately, I'm tempted to over do it. When I'm hungry, I don't think about eating healthy snacks. I think about chips, cookies, candy, pizza, etc. I've made slight progress in the past week, though. For months, I've been giving in to my cravings. This week, I found a way to satisfy them without overdoing it. I had a few pieces of candy when a sugar craving hit. I had whole wheat pasta with lowfat cheese and broccoli when the urge to gorge on carbs came over me. And, in my lowest moment, when I was craving potato chips, I bought baked chips. I still ended up eating half the bag, but, trust me, that's progress.

The other good news is that I exercised five out of seven days last week. I can't stress enough how important this is to my success. Riding my exercise bike isn't even physically that difficult anymore. The reasons I don't do it more are all mental. I really hope I can stick with it this week.

The final breakthrough came last Sunday after I wrote about how terrible last week's weigh-in made me feel. For more than three years now, there's been a constant battle waging inside my head. Luckily, the side that wants to be healthy has been winning. (I think that's obvious because I have actually lost more than 90 pounds total.) Of late, though, the side that doesn't want to focus on food all the time has taken over. The healthy side seemed drastically close to throwing in the towel, but now I don't feel that way. Instead, I know I'm going to keep fighting.

I've come to far to give up now.