On a mission

I woke up Saturday morning and everything seemed so clear. I know I've blogged before about making a fresh start and being determined to get "back on track." But this time seems different. I wanted to blog about it on Saturday, but decided to give it a few days just to make sure.

The past few days have been pretty emotional. Naturally, I'm not going to give any details. What's important is how I've dealt with the emotions. I'm proud to say that at a time when I want to stuff my face with all sorts of comfort foods, my worst splurges have included a couple of glasses of wine, a few pieces of chocolate and a couple of spoonfuls of peanut butter. And that's over the course of four days.

What's even more important is that I've walked laps around my neighborhood every one of those four days -- 10.8 miles total. Walking four days in a row feels like I've overcome some major hurdle. I don't think I'm losing much weight this week (if any), but the walking has made me feel so good about myself.

We talk at work a lot about conscious choice and discipline and how they relate to success. Well, that's what it's going to take for me to reach my ultimate goal weight -- between 150 and 155. I've never really said what I want to weigh. I've talked about much I want to lose, but I can now say where I want to be. As of last Friday's weigh-in, I was at 191.

Losing 40 more pounds seems like a big goal right now since I've been hovering around 190 for months. But I actually believe it's possible. And I've come up with a few steps that I think will help me get there.

1. Make losing weight my No. 1 priority. I've said it before, but my previous success was partly because I was basically obsessed. I never did anything extreme, but I always thought about everything I put in my mouth.

2. Make a plan. I have to plan every meal and snack -- not just what I'm going to eat but when I'm going to eat it. Because I'm eating smaller meals, I have to eat more often. If I don't eat something every four hours or so, I get light-headed and then I eat the wrong foods and too much of them.

3. Exercise. For now, walking is fine. My goal is at least 15 miles a week. I'd like to eventually increase that goal after a few weeks or incorporate some other form of exercise into my routine.

4. Set small goals. My first goal is to lose 9.2 pounds by July 1. That's about a pound a week, which is realistic.

5. Celebrate success. I don't yet know how I'm going to reward myself, but I will think of something between now and July 1.

I know there are lots of other factors that will help me succeed but I think these five are the most important. Wish me luck!