Weekly weigh-in: Not good enough

I've had a good run of days (and even weeks) filled with positive energy, so I suppose it had to come to an end at some point. There have been a few positive blips this week, but mostly it's been full of pessimism and negative thinking.

I feel like nothing I do is good enough. I try so hard. I know I set impossible standards for myself and others, and inevitably I'm disappointed when we don't meet them. This week's weigh-in is just another example. I lost a half pound this week. I should be happy about that, but it doesn't feel good enough.

I also know that the way I feel right now has nothing to do with the weigh-in. It's been an emotionally draining week. Yes, there have been highs and lows. I've been working on not letting the lows get to me, but it's not easy, especially when I expect things to turn out a certain way and they don't.

It's funny, though, because I started the week off knowing that it was going to be stressful. I took on too much at one time. Then, throw in the unpredictable nature of the news business and it's all been a bit overwhelming.

I did think that the weigh-in would be better. With the exception of getting off track a little last weekend, I've been following the plan. I even started walking again this week. I should feel great. So why am I back to my old way of thinking? You know, the way that makes me not want to leave the house because I don't think I can be around people.

I wish I could end on a positive note. I just don't have it in me this morning.