The scale isn't exactly cooperating, but I think all the walking in the past week is helping. I put on a pair of pants this morning that I bought just a couple of months ago and they are really too big. It was a great feeling. I wore them anyway, of course. But all day I actually felt self-conscious about how big they were. I even felt weird at a social event after work because my pants were just too loose.
I know. I should simply be thrilled that my clothes are too big. I am. Really. But I actually feel more self-conscience about the way I look now than I ever did before. Maybe it's because I am so public about my weight loss. A year ago, I really didn't even want people to know I was trying to lose weight. Now, I blog about so many personal things.
People tell me all the time that they can't believe I'm so open about it. It's weird for me, especially when people want to talk to me about what I've written or when I think about who might be reading. But I generally think the blogging is a good thing. It helps me focus and express my feelings. And it's really contributed to my mental progress. Plus, these are my thoughts and feelings. If people can't accept that this is who I am, they shouldn't read and they shouldn't be my friend.
So putting on a pair of pants and thinking all day about how they were too big is mental progress. Trust me. They actually looked too big before I put them on. That rarely happens. In fact, as I've said before, most of the time, I look in the mirror and I don't see any difference. But clearly I look different. People tell me all the time. Why can't I see what they see?
What's more amazing about today is that it came at a time when the number on the scale isn't decreasing as quickly as I'd like. But I have stepped up my exercise in the past week. I think it's making a difference in the shape of my body. I guess I hope it is. Why else would my pants seem so big today?
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Keep up the good work! You're doing great!
ReplyDeleteIt is very funny how difficult it is to see ourselves. I had the same experience today, except that these pants weren't so new (although I wore some last week exactly the same - bought them a couple of months ago and realized I wouldn't be wearing them any more already.) The ones today used to be short and tight, and now they're long and baggy. I think probably most of my weight was between waist and knees, but even knowing that, and looking in the mirror, it just doesn't look that different. In fact, I sometimes think someone has played tricks on me with the scale! But these pants really tell the story - used to strain at the seams, now they hang in folds. And like you, I'm pretty sure all my walking has helped in that direction, too. What can I say but good for us!!! ?
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